3 prerequisites to influence
Influence is simply the ability to affect something. It sounds simple, but it's quite complex. As you've probably heard me say before, there are two sources of power in most companies: authority & influence. Authority is given to you by your title or position. Influence is earned by you. It's fundamental to leadership. As we all know, it's not uncommon to be a manager but not a leader.
So where do you start with influence?
1) Observe. If you've ever been to an etiquette training, one of the most common pieces of advice is to observe which fork others pick up if you're not sure. The same is true for influence. If you're not sure how your stakeholder is influenced, pay attention to how they behave in meetings. You can learn about their communication style, decision-making style, etc. Influence is about giving others information in the way they need it, in order to effectively take action or make the decision. One of the biggest mistakes emerging professionals make is not adapting their influence strategy to the stakeholder they're trying to influence.
As I've grown my personal creativity practice, one of the things I've been practicing is observation. It's hard. To be able to just observe and not judge or have your mind wander takes practice. So, here's your challenge: this week in a meeting with a decision-maker, take time to observe them. Share with me in the comments what you learned.
Once you figure out what works, you've hit gold. Typically, even after observing them, it will take a couple iterations to really nail it.
For example, through observation, I learned that a decision-maker I worked with couldn't handle it if things weren't aligned on the PowerPoint slide he was looking at. I would sit next to him and see him drawing little arrows to show how things needed to be aligned. He would correct formatting errors and typos on the page. He couldn't help himself. While he was doing this, he wasn't paying any attention to the person speaking. In another case, he scanned documents in the first couple minutes and was ready to move on. He didn't have questions but knew the person still had another 10 minutes to present so he picked up his iPad and started responding to emails. After observing this, what simple strategies would you employ in your first effort to influence this leader?
2) Listen. This sounds obvious, but many of us are SO bad at it. We listen in order to respond not to understand. This is something I've been working on for years. Truly listening - not just listening for a pause or appropriate moment to jump in and share my thought.
In order to understand what motivates someone or what keeps them up at night you just have to listen. People tell you all the time what they need. Many of us are so busy trying to get things done that we fail to pay attention. If you ask a leader, what keeps you up at night, you'll often get a canned answer. If you listen when they're speaking in meetings and town halls, you'll begin to understand what really matters to them.
3) Establish credibility. We've talked about what credibility is. It's important to start building credibility with someone long before you need to influence them. Some people trust quickly. For other, it takes some time before they will listen to what you say and even longer to earn a seat at their table.
Want to learn more about influence? I will be going live on Facebook on Sunday at 7pm Eastern. Join me then and I'll answer your questions.
My program, Emerging Leaders in Technology and Engineering is now accepting applicants for the fall 2020 cohort. If you are interested in growing your credibility, influence, and thought leadership so you can enhance your visibility with senior leaders and advance your career, set up a session with me to learn more about the program.
